Straight to the Bottom

Straight to the Bottom
D. Paul Angel
457 Words

Dr. Callahan walked into the conference room. Once again she was the only woman in the room, but instead of all the older, white men in suits gawking at her, they we solemnly looking at their papers.

“You wanted to finally speak about my Psych Eval of the Suspect?” she asked, standing a little straighter.

“Dammit Callahan we don’t have time for that shit!,” Director Ashland erupted, “That asshole planted a nuke under New York! It’s going to go off God knows when, and we are shit out of options.”

“If you read my report-”

“Stop! Just fucking stop. We’re past the psych bullshit, got it?”

“Yes Director.”

“Now, we brought you in because you’re going to have to make a decision, and you’re the only one in this room who can. You have to understand there are 8 million lives at stake. We can’t evacuate them, we can’t even warn them without hysteria and panic, and the blast would kill almost all of them. Your country, these people, need you. They need you to make the right decision, regardless of personal sacrifices. 8 million souls, Callahan!”

“I understand sir.”

“Good. Because fuck knows I hate to be the one to say this, but we are out of options.”

“Yes sir.”

“Our Perp has given us a quid pro quo offer. He gives us the location in exchange for providing him, to be brutally blunt, a sex partner.”

After a moment of quiet, Ashland continued, “So you understand then why you’re the only person in this room we can ask to make that decision?”

“I do.” Callahan paused in thought before continuing into the room’s quietus, “Frankly, Director, it’s my decision that you would be the best choice.”

Ashland shushed the sudden shouts and gesticulations around the conference table, quelling the surreptitious glances towards him as well. “What? What in the Hell are you talking about?”

“As my report details, Sir, the Suspect is a sexual sadist with extreme dominance fantasies. Therefore the only decision I can offer is which of you would best fulfill that fantasy.” Callahan briefly waited for the renewed flurry of shouts and activity around the table to settle before continuing over the Director, “Sir, breaking you and exposing your deeply closeted urges is exactly what he wants.”

Ashland brooked no more, slamming the table with his hand, silencing the room as he stood, “This is an outrage!”

“It is, sir. But, as you said, sometimes the lives of 8 million people are dependent upon one individual’s personal sacrifice. I’m sorry sir, but my professional opinion is that you are the best option.”

“But I-”

“I’m sorry Director. Good luck, Sir.”

“But I’m a Christian!”

“Then I guess this is your Gethsemane. Sir.”


4 thoughts on “Straight to the Bottom

        1. Yep! He’s going to be even more upset when finally does read the psych eval and discovers that while the suspect is a manipulative psycopath, he is utterly incapable of building such a device.

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